I wasn’t proud of having put it off until there was no more time, but I was looking forward to it at least being something of an adventure, expecting the crowds and hoopla and reporters of years past. But – nothing! Where were the picketers protesting taxation? The marketers giving away free samples?  The strolling musicians? The guys in gorilla suits, and the reporters covering all this?  My first April 14th minutes-to-midnight filing, and it was a let down.  Just a lot of hot, aggravated people. And those of us waiting for them to wait on us.  But, with or without a party, I had no choice because I really WAS out of time - it was the absolute last chance for me to file my 2005 taxes if I wanted my refund.

Yeah, you read it right. 2005. I’ll admit it. I’m a big-time procrastinator. I’ve lost more money to late fees, missed rebates and unclaimed refunds than I care to add up. I’m still disgusted that I’m one of the few people who didn’t get a stimulus check when they were giving them out last year. (agh, why did I have to remember that?).  But at least I’m not dodging my taxes, so I have nothing to fear from POTUS Obama’s plan to rock the tax (haven) boat.  Or so I thought.

See, the administration wants to change a long-standing law that allows American companies to defer paying these taxes as long as the funds are kept overseas.  Many large companies avoid paying U.S. taxes on revenue from foreign subsidiaries by reinvesting the money overseas, by parking cash in various accounts or by plowing it back into foreign operations. But the POTUS thinks these little loopholes need plugging, and that the nearly $190 billion in recoverable taxes could be used right here in the U.S. of A.  (true that, true that.)

But then I learned that – just for example – without the deferral provision,  a company like, oh, let’s say Google - might have been required to pay an additional $1 billion last year on a tax bill that amounted to roughly $1.6 billion, according to a regulatory filing made by the company. Huh.

Now, I’m still tentatively on board with this. Mainly because too many companies get away with paying a hell of a lot less percentage-wise than I do. But as much as I hate to be on the side of the Party of No about anything, I confess I’m reserving full on-boardness, because I want to know more about how this might affect me personally.  (I know, I sound Republican like a mofo.) Like, would Google start charging for one of the (dozen) sweet — free — domain email set-ups, complete with Docs & Analytics that I currently enjoy? Because I would not dig that at all.  And that’s just the tip of the (free) tech iceberg that rocks my Inter-prising world.

Perhaps there could be a teeeny little tech loophole, where they could keep SOME of their money off-shore, as long as it served the greater good, you know. Like keeping stuff on the internets free so infinitesimally smaller ‘net businesses than Google can make their way.  Obama’s our first Tech President.  He should understand where I’m coming from.

Read more about all this on Google while it’s still free.

In my case, my almost downfall was the the flippable pancake pan, which insured perfect, easy pancakes, crepes, and omelette’s in every batch.

Fortunately, I was talked down from making this purchase by my very wise friend, as she gently, virtually guided me away from pan, and symbolically placed a griddle in my disappointed hands. I have never looked back or regretted passing up on yet another ridiculous fad.

Unfortunately, those very words would come back to haunt my friend (whom you already know as a fellow blogging Chick, but to spare her pain and embarrassment, Bohochick shall remain nameless), as she fell in love (and sadly, purchased) one of the most ridiculous, inane kitchen devices since the dreaded pancake turner—the Billy Mays approved Slider Pan. For shame. For crying shame.

This pan, which leads the drooling masses to believe that it’s somehow impossible to make homemade slider burgers in your very own kitchen, scarring them with tales of large, heavy meatballs as the finished product, or worse, all of the small patties somehow forming together to make a large, mess of a meatloaf right there in your grill pan.

Yes folks (especially you, the still unnamed, but properly shamed “Chick”), it is possible and relatively simple to make sliders at home. In a regular pan. That you already have in your kitchen cabinets.

It’s just like …. you know, making regular burgers. Except smaller. The way we’ve all been doing it for well over a century, without the use of new fangled pans.

But never fear, this is why Ebay and Craigslist exists. Simply sell it (and the rest of your silly kitchen gadgets that are currently in hidden disarray, collecting dust, tumbling out and crashing to the floor any time you open the door to one of your splintering cabinets) at a loss to another sucker, and never speak of it again. If you are willing to forget it, then so am I. Starting right now. I’m not one to harp on bad judgment. Not at all. Nope.

Now then, moving on from the ridiculousness of a Slider Pan, and the silly people who bought it and will regret it always. As a cooking contester and recipe Queen, food enthusiast, and obese person, I thought briefly about the charm and appeal of these mini burgers, and why this is a fad that’s sweeping chain restaurants across the nation.

Obviously, the “appetizer” aspect is welcoming, being able to sample something without committing to it. Being able to share with others in your dinner party. Having a bit of variety; different burgers, different types of meats, different cheeses, different condiments, and different toppings.

Or my favorite, after settling into a booth at my favorite chain joint, and sampling a platter of mini burgers with a mound of onion rings— sliders just plain tastes a whole lot better than a huge burger. (Consider the deliciousness of a McDonald’s cheeseburger with the thin patty and minced onions compared to the big, bready, rather dry ¼ Pounder with Cheese with onions that are sliced nearly as big as the pickles.)

The meat to bun ratio is incredible. The meat is juicier and more evenly cooked, because it doesn’t have to sit on the grill for as long.

Also, sampling something you love and crave, without the inflated calories and fat, this is also a plus. As long as you don’t eat the entire platter, then it becomes pretty pointless from a dieting perspective.

I decided to try my hands at sliders for New Years Eve, figuring it to be great party food. Of course, I spent NYE at home with my husband and two kids so I haven’t actually tested this theory, but it logically seemed like great appetizers, and they are super easy and fast to make, due to the decreased cooking time, and perfect for a weeknight meal. Especially if you have kids.

After googling the recipe and repeatedly coming up with hits involving pureed beef livers and canned baby food, I quickly abandoned my search and decided to throw caution to the wind, and prepare the burgers the way I always had, just smaller. No extra fuss and preparation (or pans!) needed.

This is the original recipe I first used on NYE. The Korean barbecue sauce gives it an extra kick and spice that you won’t find in traditional barbecue sauces. I added an egg, which does not change the flavor, but rather, it helps bind the meat a bit better since the extra sauce can make it a bit too moist. I try to always avoid breadcrumbs in hamburgers, because I don’t care for the compact, dry texture it gives the cooked meat.

I used a combo of ground sirloin and regular ground round, but any combination would work, as well as ground chicken, ground turkey, crab, tuna, salmon, or even ground pork. Hell, if you have some venison, ground that up as well and make a burger out of it. (Just don’t serve it to me. I like my burgers cute and adorable free.)

You can play around with the sauces, using steak sauce, teriyaki sauce, an orange sauce, etc.

In general, sliders don’t typically have a lot of the vegetable toppings you would find on a regular burger, aside from minced onions and pickles. As someone who doesn’t really care for tomatoes or lettuce on any burger (seriously, the lettuce eventually gets wilted and slimy from the heat of burger), this appeals to me. When I have the time, I also like to fry up homemade onion straws to go on the burger. Alas, this is not really feasible for a quick weeknight meal (canned onions are not an option).

Smokey Korean Style Sirloin Sliders

Makes 10-12 burgers

10-12 slices of bacon

½ pound ground chuck

½ pound ground sirloin

1 large egg

½ teaspoon seasoned salt

½ teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon ground black pepper

2 heaping tablespoons quality Korean barbecue sauce

Non stick cooking spray or vegetable oil

10-12 Sweet Parkerhouse rolls (I like to use King’s Hawaiian)

5-7 slices American Cheese (not cheese food) or mild cheddar

2 tablespoons regular yellow mustard

½ cup Korean barbecue sauce

Line a microwave safe plate with paper towels. Add bacon in an even layer. If desired, cover with one paper towel, and place additional pieces of bacon on top, as a second layer. Cover with another paper towel, and place in the microwave. On high power, cook the bacon for 7-9 minutes, or until cooked through and crisp. Remove from plate, and drain on paper towels. Set aside.

In a large bowl, add ground beef, egg, salts and pepper, and barbecue sauce and with your hands or a large spoon, combine until well mixed, being careful not to overwork the meat. Divide the meat mixture into 10 (12 if you like your patties on the thin side) equal portions. Form the meat into small, 2 inch patties and place on a parchment lined plate.

Heat a grill pan over high heat, and spray liberally with nonstick cooking spray, or vegetable oil, and add the patties. Cook over high heat on one side for about 3 minutes, and then flip the patties. Reduce heat to medium, and continue cooking for another 2-3 minutes.

Heat a large cast iron skillet over medium high heat. Slice parkerhouse rolls, spray with non stick cooking spray (or brush lightly with melted butter, if preferred) and place in cast iron skillet cut side down. Reduce heat to low, and let the buns cook for about 1-2 minutes, or until toasted brown.

Meanwhile, remove the burgers from heat once finished cooking. Place one piece of bacon, broken in half, on top of each patty.

Followed by half of a slice of cheese. Repeat this process on all of the burgers, and replace back over a low heat in order to melt the cheese.

In a small bowl, mix together the mustard and barbecue sauce, and spread about 1 tablespoon on each cut side of the roll. Place one burger on the bottom side of the roll, and place on top roll. Repeat this process until all burgers are assembled.

Serve immediately. E

In my case, my almost downfall was the the flippable pancake pan, which insured perfect, easy pancakes, crepes, and omelette’s in every batch.

Fortunately, I was talked down from making this purchase by my very wise friend, as she gently, virtually guided me away from pan, and symbolically placed a griddle in my disappointed hands. I have never looked back or regretted passing up on yet another ridiculous fad.

Unfortunately, those very words would come back to haunt my friend (whom you already know as a fellow blogging Chick, but to spare her pain and embarrassment, Bohochick shall remain nameless), as she fell in love (and sadly, purchased) one of the most ridiculous, inane kitchen devices since the dreaded pancake turner—the Billy Mays approved Slider Pan. For shame. For crying shame.

This pan, which leads the drooling masses to believe that it’s somehow impossible to make homemade slider burgers in your very own kitchen, scarring them with tales of large, heavy meatballs as the finished product, or worse, all of the small patties somehow forming together to make a large, mess of a meatloaf right there in your grill pan.

Yes folks (especially you, the still unnamed, but properly shamed “Chick”), it is possible and relatively simple to make sliders at home. In a regular pan. That you already have in your kitchen cabinets.

It’s just like …. you know, making regular burgers. Except smaller. The way we’ve all been doing it for well over a century, without the use of new fangled pans.

But never fear, this is why Ebay and Craigslist exists. Simply sell it (and the rest of your silly kitchen gadgets that are currently in hidden disarray, collecting dust, tumbling out and crashing to the floor any time you open the door to one of your splintering cabinets) at a loss to another sucker, and never speak of it again. If you are willing to forget it, then so am I. Starting right now. I’m not one to harp on bad judgment. Not at all. Nope.

Now then, moving on from the ridiculousness of a Slider Pan, and the silly people who bought it and will regret it always. As a cooking contester and recipe Queen, food enthusiast, and obese person, I thought briefly about the charm and appeal of these mini burgers, and why this is a fad that’s sweeping chain restaurants across the nation.

Obviously, the “appetizer” aspect is welcoming, being able to sample something without committing to it. Being able to share with others in your dinner party. Having a bit of variety; different burgers, different types of meats, different cheeses, different condiments, and different toppings.

Or my favorite, after settling into a booth at my favorite chain joint, and sampling a platter of mini burgers with a mound of onion rings— sliders just plain tastes a whole lot better than a huge burger. (Consider the deliciousness of a McDonald’s cheeseburger with the thin patty and minced onions compared to the big, bready, rather dry ¼ Pounder with Cheese with onions that are sliced nearly as big as the pickles.)

The meat to bun ratio is incredible. The meat is juicier and more evenly cooked, because it doesn’t have to sit on the grill for as long.

Also, sampling something you love and crave, without the inflated calories and fat, this is also a plus. As long as you don’t eat the entire platter, then it becomes pretty pointless from a dieting perspective.

I decided to try my hands at sliders for New Years Eve, figuring it to be great party food. Of course, I spent NYE at home with my husband and two kids so I haven’t actually tested this theory, but it logically seemed like great appetizers, and they are super easy and fast to make, due to the decreased cooking time, and perfect for a weeknight meal. Especially if you have kids.

After googling the recipe and repeatedly coming up with hits involving pureed beef livers and canned baby food, I quickly abandoned my search and decided to throw caution to the wind, and prepare the burgers the way I always had, just smaller. No extra fuss and preparation (or pans!) needed.

This is the original recipe I first used on NYE. The Korean barbecue sauce gives it an extra kick and spice that you won’t find in traditional barbecue sauces. I added an egg, which does not change the flavor, but rather, it helps bind the meat a bit better since the extra sauce can make it a bit too moist. I try to always avoid breadcrumbs in hamburgers, because I don’t care for the compact, dry texture it gives the cooked meat.

I used a combo of ground sirloin and regular ground round, but any combination would work, as well as ground chicken, ground turkey, crab, tuna, salmon, or even ground pork. Hell, if you have some venison, ground that up as well and make a burger out of it. (Just don’t serve it to me. I like my burgers cute and adorable free.)

You can play around with the sauces, using steak sauce, teriyaki sauce, an orange sauce, etc.

In general, sliders don’t typically have a lot of the vegetable toppings you would find on a regular burger, aside from minced onions and pickles. As someone who doesn’t really care for tomatoes or lettuce on any burger (seriously, the lettuce eventually gets wilted and slimy from the heat of burger), this appeals to me. When I have the time, I also like to fry up homemade onion straws to go on the burger. Alas, this is not really feasible for a quick weeknight meal (canned onions are not an option).

Smokey Korean Style Sirloin Sliders

Makes 10-12 burgers

10-12 slices of bacon

½ pound ground chuck

½ pound ground sirloin

1 large egg

½ teaspoon seasoned salt

½ teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon ground black pepper

2 heaping tablespoons quality Korean barbecue sauce

Non stick cooking spray or vegetable oil

10-12 Sweet Parkerhouse rolls (I like to use King’s Hawaiian)

5-7 slices American Cheese (not cheese food) or mild cheddar

2 tablespoons regular yellow mustard

½ cup Korean barbecue sauce

Line a microwave safe plate with paper towels. Add bacon in an even layer. If desired, cover with one paper towel, and place additional pieces of bacon on top, as a second layer. Cover with another paper towel, and place in the microwave. On high power, cook the bacon for 7-9 minutes, or until cooked through and crisp. Remove from plate, and drain on paper towels. Set aside.

In a large bowl, add ground beef, egg, salts and pepper, and barbecue sauce and with your hands or a large spoon, combine until well mixed, being careful not to overwork the meat. Divide the meat mixture into 10 (12 if you like your patties on the thin side) equal portions. Form the meat into small, 2 inch patties and place on a parchment lined plate.

Heat a grill pan over high heat, and spray liberally with nonstick cooking spray, or vegetable oil, and add the patties. Cook over high heat on one side for about 3 minutes, and then flip the patties. Reduce heat to medium, and continue cooking for another 2-3 minutes.

Heat a large cast iron skillet over medium high heat. Slice parkerhouse rolls, spray with non stick cooking spray (or brush lightly with melted butter, if preferred) and place in cast iron skillet cut side down. Reduce heat to low, and let the buns cook for about 1-2 minutes, or until toasted brown.

Meanwhile, remove the burgers from heat once finished cooking. Place one piece of bacon, broken in half, on top of each patty.

Followed by half of a slice of cheese. Repeat this process on all of the burgers, and replace back over a low heat in order to melt the cheese.

In a small bowl, mix together the mustard and barbecue sauce, and spread about 1 tablespoon on each cut side of the roll. Place one burger on the bottom side of the roll, and place on top roll. Repeat this process until all burgers are assembled.

Serve immediately. E

]]> http://www.3blackchicksblogging.com/2010/06/28/smokey-korean-style-sirlon-sliders/feed/ 0 http://www.3blackchicksblogging.com/2009/05/13/dumpster-diving-delicacies-with-sandra-lee/ http://www.3blackchicksblogging.com/2009/05/13/dumpster-diving-delicacies-with-sandra-lee/#comments Wed, 13 May 2009 05:40:17 +0000 CulinaryChick http://www.3blackchicksblogging.com/2009/05/13/dumpster-diving-delicacies-with-sandra-lee/ You are reading a “This Shit Will Kill You” Worldwide Exclusive:

Press Release

Fresh from her wildly successful and history making instructional cooking show “Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee”, Chef Sandra Lee invites eager viewers into her kitchen for an all new series, highlighting the struggles and challenges facing every day families as they attempt to find balance and stability in this time of economic uncertainty. Known for her trademark semi cooking style, Sandra no longer will focus her attention on vomitous recipes that will sentence your your kids to a lifetime of obesity and giving your spouses angina—she now has her sights set on bankrupting you both financially and physically! Chef Sandra Lee will demonstrate how to cook delicious, healthy dinners on a slim budget, that will make even the laziest frau smile triumphantly at her eager and starving family, and claim, “Now this is a meal I can truly be proud to serve. Thanks Chef Lee.”

This week, join the Chef in the kitchen for her debut, as she gives you tips on how to prepare a budget friendly brunch, using the same processed crap that you can find in your pantry. Right now! This instant!

First, turn that stale, week old bread into delectable French toast, coupled with a delicious brown sugar banana syrup that will leave your guests thinking that the syrup was made with actual bananas and real brown sugar! (A Sassy Note from Simple Sandy: scrape the mold off the bread, store in a Ziplock baggie, and use later as a blue cheese alternative on your salads, baked potatoes, or even on pasta!)
Next, using canned tomatoes and celery sticks, Chef Sandra teaches you how to make a delightful Fresh Asparagus and Tomato tart, cleverly substituting saltine crackers for pie crust! A fine dish that will surely have your guest reaching for the kaopectate.

No brunch would be complete without a divine, homemade French pastry, which is exactly why Sandra won’t give you one! Instead, Sandra will give you step by step instructions on how to open a box of donuts, carefully arrange them on a platter, and make them your own, so that your friends and family will never know your store bought secret. Or rather, they wouldn’t dare say it to your face and risk your rage.

Finally, in a family friendly version of her classic “cocktail” time, Simple Sandra shows you how to make a wonderful and kid approved “Virgin Mimosa”, which your guests will never know is just a cleverly disguised bottle of Orange Shasta!

So join Sandra in the kitchen, as she inspires cooking novices like herself, how to shrewdly get ahead, and how to fake being competent, without putting forth a lick of effort!

Through her impressive vaginal skills, drive, determination (did we mention her skills?), she is now a worldwide acclaimed home expert, chef, and philosopher, and can buy and sell your sorry asses with one wave of her perfectly manicured finger.

If Sandra can do it, so can you. Just be sure to marry well.

Be sure to also pick up her book, now featured on prime display at every major bookstore in the country. Because in America, there is no accounting for taste. Sandra Lee operates on this very theory.

The “it” I’m referring to, in this case, was my Blackberry Curve. I loved it. It was almost an appendage it just wasn’t born with me but it was always with me as if it had been.  It was what most people refer to as a crackberry because of the addiction but my addiction went deeper, I was obsessed with it, I needed it, I felt not quite whole without it.

I lovingly bought a shock absorbent cover, increased the memory storage and knew we’d be close friends, me depending on it more than the other way around for a very long time.  I was ok with knowing it was a one-sided friendship.  I took, Blackberry gave, this worked for me.

Fast forward to December 2008.  Christmas. A small box was under the tree from my husband, I was expecting something small, not quite sure what but definitely didn’t expect a concierge appointment card from the Apple Store.

An iTouch maybe?  Ehhh wasn’t wanting one but I’d take it.  But no. Upon opening the appointment card, an iPhone card fell out with it. Glossy like the phone with it’s shiny icons looking back me, I reeled backwards.  I wasn’t impressed. Not to mention the appointment was for the day after Christmas at 8am.  Was he crazy?

I’ll give whomever is over there running the Apple empire.  They know how to market.  The stores are just as shiny and glossy and  inviting as their products.  The sleek tables, the minimalist design and the “genius bar” sign lends to you believing as soon as you walk in that you’ve stepped into something higher, something better, something that only people who are really in the know, know all about.

I forgot about my old faithful friend tucked away in my bag right then and there as soon as the sleek, light, bigger screened gadget slid across my fingertips.  With the first swish through the application pages, I was hooked.  I could see in my future that i’d be checking my alcohol level while out drinking, playing word freak with complete strangers across the globe and checking my MRI right from my phone even though I had no need to get an MRI in the first place.

I came home, my number ported over and didn’t flinch when the Verizon bill arrived later having defaulted on my contract.  I did flinch however when all the realities of the iPhone hit me slowly, steady and the realization came that all that glitter wasn’t gold.

First of all, if any $50 cell phone at Wal-mart can send an MMS file, why can’t my $299 phone?  I hadn’t even thought to ask if the phone was capable of sending photos because what phone can’t these days?  That was a rough blow to the gut, I took photos daily on my Blackberry and sent them out constantly especially to family. Not only can I not SEND photos but I can’t receive either.

The iPhone camera is a 2 pixel piece of shit. It takes horrible photos in low light, there is no zoom capabilities and no flash so nighttime photos are completely out, hell even daytime photos can be out if you’re in the shade. In short, it sucks.

It’s no fun when you’re showing your friend an application and a text from your husband pops right up on the screen that says “have that ass waiting for me tonight when I get home.”  Yeah, there’s no privacy when your texts come through unless your phone is locked and not in use and if you’re in an iPhone user, that’s only when you’re sleep or charging which brings me to my 4th complaint.

Because of all those cool apps you see on the commercials that you think it would be fun to have (and it is and you do use them), your battery life is sucked dry in just a few hours easily. I constantly have to carry my phone charger with me and I have no shame asking a waiter, “can you plus this in for me over my the register?”

forwarding texts? out, no can do, won’t happen

copying and pasting? can’t do this either, how can you? there aren’t right or left mouse buttons to do it.

That’s when it hit me, the iPhone is a gadget, it’s a toy, it’s not a small computer in my hand with the awesome feature of being a phone too, it’s a phone with a bunch of shit to play with on it.  That’s it!

Is it a grand toy? Yes! Those applications are king and many new millionaires who peddle their wares in the App Store will agree with me but  I still miss my all my teensy tiny Blackberry computer-esque like qualities that the iPhone is sorely lacking.  Yes, there’s more to the iPhone than just the apps thanks to the staggering technology of the Apple platform but I still want some simple copy and pasting!

Screwed because I had already sold the Blackberry, my husband, who also bought himself an iPhone, complained with me.  It was becoming our weekly mantra that switched to daily and then almost hourly and we were – this close to ditching another contract and going back to Verizon when someone informed us of the iPhone software update coming in June of 2009. All of the complaints are rumored to be resolved and resolved the Apple way which means some pretty nifty tricks.

I’m hoping all the hype is true or you can bet I’ll go back to cursing Steve Jobs name and shaking my fist at the sky for being duped into the most expensive shiny toy ever.  All while knowing I neglected a steady friend the day after Christmas with the hopes that I’ll be forgiven and allowed a second chance to befriend them once again.

Well this time it’s her sneakers.  It seems Michelle wore $500 kicks to a food bank.  That’s what all the fuss is about.  For real.

I mean, she’s the FLOTUS! What is she supposed to do, wear chonkletas to prove she’s one of the people?

Wearing expensive sneakers when you’re the First (M.F.)  Lady Of The (M.F.) United States is not a crime. HOWEVER … pairing them with those creeping capris? There’s your reason for outrage, folks.

Love you Michelle, but that is NOT a good look. Maybe you should have worn the chonkletas, then nobody would have cared and this photo wouldn’t be splashed across the internets.

At least the ankles aren’t ashy. Imagine the firestorm THAT would have set off! (Don’t even play black people, you know you would have been all over that, sending her Vaseline and Palmers’ Cocoa Butter. Or both. )

What say the people?

Yay
My male opinion. . .
This is not news nor a negative reflection on her – she is our FIRST LADY . We want her to look good, feel comfortable, and represent us as well as she does. Would you send the Queen of England to the Bronx in a pair of $15.00 sneakers? NO. So why the First Lady?

Oh my God, Michelle Obama is wearing expensive shoes to a help the poor event! Next thing you know she will be taking a Chauffeur driven limo with Secret Service Agents as body guards. And I bet she flew in a private jet and maybe even a helicopter on her way to the event! What did you expect the First Lady of the United States to wear, Keds and old jeans?

Let’s see: If the First Lady does things to help the poor, but does it while not being personally poor herself, she’s nothing but a hypocrite? Is that it? Better that she spit in the face of the poor, and denigrate them, while wearing stuff from Wal-Mart.

Better that her husband, the President of the United States, implement policies that screw the poor and the middle class and deliver more dollars into the hands of the already extremely wealthy. I think that no matter what Michelle Obama does, media types like you will always find a way to claim it shows “hypocracy” . (sic)

Because we all know that she should have put on a pair of $90 JcPenny’s sneaks before feeding the poor. Or perhaps some old, worn out (with a hole in the toe) sneaker for feeding the poor. I mean we must dress for the occasion, right? LOL. It’s not like anyone wouldn’t have noticed had she slipped on some cheap sneaks because every one knows she’s rich already. They would have said she was trying to play the crowd.

And if she goes to give a talk the site of some natural disaster like a hurricane, she should rip her dress so that she is fit for the occasion. hehe.. Point is, what she wears does not change her status. And most NORMAL people wouldn’t expect her to alter clothing.

Nay
Didn’t you get the memo? You are supposed to comment only on her buff arms and J Crew sweater not her size 14, $450 shoe encased feet.

If she wants to wear $540 sneakers – which are incredibly ugly, by the way – that’s fine with me, but she and her husband should quit telling the rest of us to sacrifice. They apparently don’t know the value of setting an example.

You don’t go to a (pre-programed ) helping out the poor photo-op in coture footwear. It’s either bad judgment or a total disconnect.

What’s your opinion?

I wasn’t proud of having put it off until there was no more time, but I was looking forward to it at least being something of an adventure, expecting the crowds and hoopla and reporters of years past.  But – nothing! Where were the picketers protesting taxation? The marketers giving away free samples?  The strolling musicians? The guys in gorilla suits, and the reporters covering all this?  My first April 14th minutes-to-midnight filing, and it was a let down.  Just a lot of hot, aggravated people. And those of us waiting for them to wait on us.  But, with or without a party, I had no choice because I really WAS out of time - it was the absolute last chance for me to file my 2005 taxes if I wanted my refund.

Yeah, you read it right. 2005. I’ll admit it. I’m a big-time procrastinator. I’ve lost more money to late fees, missed rebates and unclaimed refunds than I care to add up. I’m still disgusted that I’m one of the few people who didn’t get a stimulus check when they were giving them out last year. (agh, why did I have to remember that?).  But at least I’m not dodging my taxes, so I have nothing to fear from POTUS Obama’s plan to rock the tax (haven) boat.  Or so I thought.

See, the administration wants to change a long-standing law that allows American companies to defer paying these taxes as long as the funds are kept overseas.  Many large companies avoid paying U.S. taxes on revenue from foreign subsidiaries by reinvesting the money overseas, by parking cash in various accounts or by plowing it back into foreign operations. But the POTUS thinks these little loopholes need plugging, and that the nearly $190 billion in recoverable taxes could be used right here in the U.S. of A.  (true that, true that.)

But then I learned that – just for example – without the deferral provision,  a company like, oh, let’s say Google - might have been required to pay an additional $1 billion last year on a tax bill that amounted to roughly $1.6 billion, according to a regulatory filing made by the company. Huh.

Now, I’m still tentatively on board with this. Mainly because too many companies get away with paying a hell of a lot less percentage-wise than I do. But as much as I hate to be on the side of the Party of No about anything, I confess I’m reserving full on-boardness, because I want to know more about how this might affect me personally.  (I know, I sound Republican like a mofo.) Like, would Google start charging for one of the (dozen) sweet — free — domain email set-ups, complete with Docs & Analytics that I currently enjoy? Because I would not dig that at all.  And that’s just the tip of the (free) tech iceberg that rocks my Inter-prising world.

Perhaps there could be a teeeny little tech loophole, where they could keep SOME of their money off-shore, as long as it served the greater good, you know. Like keeping stuff on the internets free so infinitesimally smaller ‘net businesses than Google can make their way.  Obama’s our first Tech President.  He should understand where I’m coming from.  

Read more about all this on Google while it’s still free.

There’s not a whole lot that makes me happy these days, so I appreciate the smile this manages to elicit from me when it comes on. I think it’s just the complete randomness and joy she gets from that bag of Chex Mix.  And the plinky music. It could be the way the narrator voices her actions: “Yep. She just opened a bag of Chex Mix.”  Like,  there she goes again.  As if it makes perfect sense.  

Or maybe it’s the little move where she yanks up her jeans after rocking out for a minute, as the voiceover reminds you that there’s 60% less fat than a bag of potato chips that amuses me.  I don’t really know what it is, I just know I enjoy it. Even though I actually hate Chex Mix.  So I guess that would make this commercial a success, huh?

Fast forward a bit to pre-school age when I was a huge fan of the children’s show, Romper Room. Romper Room aired right after Sesame Street and I begged my mother to allow me to bogart the television a little while longer to watch Romper Room; not for the Jack in the Box (that I never had a chance to own) or for the non-speaking but very entertaining Bumble Bee, I watched that show for one thing and one thing only…for Miss MaryAnn to SAY MY NAME, DAMMIT!

I mean, didn’t she see my name in that mirror? Ever? She had the magic mirror! Was her magic mirror only for the Jans, the Peters and the Janes of this world? Apparently so, because as I grew older and spoke to my friends Jocelyn, Tanya and Nakima I found out I wasn’t the only child of African American or Latino descent that the Magic Mirror didn’t pick up on. How devastating for a child!

Imagine the punch in the gut to the self esteem of all those, who, like me, wasted precious minutes of our childhood sitting in front of the television, excited that this time would be it; this time she’d say “WILTONA! JOCELYN! TANYA! NAKIMA!” … and then, nothing. The credits roll and once again, disappointment settles in.

Not a big deal, you might say? Not a big deal? I’d bet every adult who once was a child, who waited for their name to appear in the magic mirror to be called by Miss Mary Ann remembers the hurt and disappointment of not being recognized by her and her “magic” mirror. Only in adulthood did we realize that it was our ethnicity that blocked the magic mirror from finding us.

It was the early 1980’s.  Sesame Street was integrated, public schools were integrated, but Romper Room wasn’t.

In retrospect, though, I shouldn’t have expected much from that mirror. If it were really magic, it would have told Miss Mary Ann a little something about that hair of hers, but that’s another posting…

Dear CNN:  It’s perfectly okay for ME to say Obama has swagger. (No, I do not like “swagga.” It’s lazy.)   But YOU cannot do it. Not just because you can’t, but because – seriously? – you CAN’T.  In the most literal sense of the word.

Because we’ve seen what happens when you try.

Oh, and while I’m at it? You need to stop trying to program for black people, and just, you know, program, period. Because you miss the mark every time.  And this right here?

“Our white cameraman is trying to “swagga” over there with his camera,”
“Obama has more “‘swagga’ than Mic Jagga,”

Just shameful.  Do not ever, ever, ever do this again. Ever.

(Forever, forever ever?)
 
Yes, dammit. Forever ever.)

And TJ, I’m mad at you for even entertaining this. You do not get a cute pass. (But really, you are. I’m just sayin’, man.  Don’t encourage this sort of thing. She’s draggin’ you down, dude. She made YOU look lame!)